Today, I weighed 17 pounds less than I did a month ago.
I haven’t been checking my weight obsessively – I’ll weigh myself about once a week; maybe more, maybe less, because I know that weight is not an accurate measurement of fitness or health – it’s only a limited indicator.
I’m more concerned about how I feel than I am about my actual weight, but still, feelings aren’t quantifiable.
Pounds and ounces are.
So I weighed myself this morning.
I found that I’d lost another pound since the last time I checked, which puts me only three pounds short of the halfway mark of my total goal.
Twenty pounds lost is where I get to shave my beard; twenty pounds is where I get to start working out again; twenty pounds is halfway done – so I felt pretty good when I looked at the scale and saw measurable progress.
I left for work with an upbeat attitude, thinking I can do this – I’m actually going to get there.
Awesome.
Then I got to work, and somebody brought doughnuts.
Not just any doughnuts. These were not the overly-hyped, bland vanilla Krispy Kremes that just lie there like unappealing little pieces of glazed roadkill. These were specialty jobs – huge cinnamon rolls dripping with frosting and paved with toasted pecans; massive apple and honey muffins with whole chunks of raw sugar on top; bear claws so big they’d give a grizzly a case of paw envy; and fritters the size of my head, inundated with fruit, frosting and golden goodness – and every one of them crying out to me to make them my own.
To add insult to injury, it was one of those busy days where I couldn’t break away from the room long enough to eat the real food I brought from home, so I was especially hungry.
It would have been so easy to just take one.
I REALLY wanted to take one.
A big one.
Every time I walked past them, I could almost feel my hand quivering, wanting to just snag one and shove it in my mouth. Everybody else was eating them.
Why not me, too?
Finally, I couldn’t take it any more. I reached out, grabbed the whole box…
…and carried it out to the break room.
I could have had just one; people were even encouraging me to do it, telling me how fantastic they were. At one point, somebody handed me a plastic knife and asked me to split one with them.
But the truth was, as much as I thought I wanted one, what I really wanted was to not let myself down.
I wanted the taste of success more than I wanted the taste of pastry.
The 17 pounds I’ve lost so far has given me a small taste of what improved health, self-esteem and accomplishment taste like, and I can tell you, it’s a lot better than a 1500 calorie blob of carbohydrates swimming in frosting and sprinkles.
I’ve made it this far, and I don’t want to blow it on a snack.
The good habit I’ve been working to establish actually won out over the bad habits I’ve had for too long – and that felt pretty amazing.
Good habits are established one step at a time. They’re almost never established without setbacks, but pushing through the setbacks builds character and strengthens the habit.
After almost a month, my eating plan is getting much easier.
My writing challenge is getting easier, too. Every time I sit down and write one post, I get closer to the goal – which is not finishing a hundred or a thousand consecutive posts – it’s simply establishing the habit of writing in my life, permanently.
Not writing is a like a fat, sugary doughnut.
Writing regularly is like maintaining a lean diet, a healthy body, abundant energy and the promise of great things.
Without establishing the habit, it seems a difficult choice.
Once the habit forms, it’s no contest.
What’s the sugary doughnut keeping you from your dream?
Dude, I REALLY enjoyed this post. Also, it made me want a doughnut, but only because your writing is so good. 🙂
Glad you enjoyed it!
But don’t give in to the doughnut!
Self control, BEGONE! Give in to the doughnut because, well, I probably would have.
Good job, hang in there!
Denny,
Yeah I know – Pastry loves company, right?
I’m still hanging in there – and now I’m down 26 pounds! Doughnuts are good, but accomplishing something difficult is better.
So why do I still crave doughnuts???
Because we like the tasty, and the easy over the healthy and the productive.
The Devil made me do it! isn’t really true because we have free will, but ol’ Scratch can be veeeeery persuasive.
Exactly!
And strangely enough, that principle plays into my topic today.
Mmmmm… Cake!